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Nathalie Himmelrich

Inspiring Hope | Finding healthy ways of Grieving | Writer

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baby loss

What Shall I Write When A Baby Has Died?

November 26, 2014 By Nathalie Himmelrich Leave a Comment

What Shall I Write When A Baby Has Died?

Writing a card for a baby who died? If yes, what shall I write?
I don’t want to upset the parents…

Today, this great and important question reached me by email.

I have a friend who has just given birth to twins very prematurely. One of them was unfortunately born dead and the surviving twin is understandably very ill. I want to send a card to them but also want to congratulate them on the birth of their surviving daughter at the same time acknowledging the death of the other. Any thoughts of a message I could use?

I can only answer from my personal experience and my preferences.
Obviously you should always take cultural, religious and societal differences into consideration when writing a card.
Think about the parents’ situation and not yours (in terms of religion, for example).

Acknowledge the babies and parents

First of all: always acknowledge the babies born, born alive and born still. 

When I gave birth to my twin girls, I loved and appreciated those people who sent me cards congratulating me to twins.

  • “Congratulations to the birth of your [two] daughter, sons, children.”
  • “New parents are being born – congratulations to the birth of [names].”
[Read more…] about What Shall I Write When A Baby Has Died?

Filed Under: coaching, grief/loss Tagged With: baby loss, writing a card

Grief Reflections

June 18, 2014 By Nathalie Himmelrich 3 Comments

Quote-about-grief-on-background-with-pier
What do you choose?

The experience of grief is with no doubt one of the toughest life lessons you have to master. Having lost one of my twin daughters on her 3rd day, as well as my mother through suicide following her depression I speak from personal experience. Being able to accompany my daughter in her passing has been an experience that no words could do justice. The gifts unveiled have been and still are beautiful and painful alike.

The greatest teacher of all

The other day, someone asked: Who is your biggest teacher in life? Without thinking I would have to say my two daughters. The experience of giving life and observing the transition between life and death have been the deepest experiences in my life so far. Processing grief is a road frequently travelled; yet I have not met many travellers enjoying the trip. Finding new, different and meaningful perspectives is my intent and reflecting on grief has been the inevitable journey of the past 3 years.[Tweet “Why would you want to reflect on something so painful?”]

Grief Reflections

Reflecting on your journey of grief, [Read more…] about Grief Reflections

Filed Under: emotions/feelings, ezinearticle, grief/loss Tagged With: baby loss, grief, grieving process, loss, post-loss, suicide

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