• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Nathalie Himmelrich

Inspiring Hope | Finding healthy ways of Grieving | Writer

  • Books
    • NEW BOOK! Bridging The Grief Gap
    • Shop
      • My Account
    • Amazon shop
  • About Me
    • Media Links
    • Work with Me
      • Counselling and Coaching
  • Resources
    • Courses
      • May We All Heal 2022 – A New Beginning
    • Donate
    • Grievers Support
    • Supporters Resources
    • Grieving Parents Support Network
    • Grief Quotes (Downloads)
    • Free Downloads
  • Blog
  • Podcast
    • Listen Here
    • Show Notes
  • English

emotions versus feelings

I Want To Stop Feeling This Way – Wisdom On Allowing Feelings

December 16, 2013 By Nathalie Himmelrich Leave a Comment

woman with rose
Photo by Vladyslava Andriyenko on Unsplash

I have stopped counting the number of clients coming to see me asking for ways to stop feeling what they are currently emotionally experiencing. Let’s shed a bit of light on the reasons why and when it might be suggested that you actually do exactly the opposite: allowing it.

Emotions versus feelings

First of all, let’s make some clear distinction of terms. Feelings are what you experience at the moment. They are usually clean and fresh, like tears of joy when you attend a beautiful wedding ceremony or the sadness when hearing the news of someone’s child dying.

Emotions however are, as the word says, “energy in motion”. They are a form of residual energy which is stored in the body’s connective tissue from past experiences which come up in a moment when triggered. These emotions are leftovers from a situation that have not yet been fully dealt with. You might notice the difference through the intensity which, when looking back at the moment, is out of context. Emotions usually make you become defensive or overly critical, condescending or argumentative.

Emotions/feelings versus words/actions

Another important differentiation has to be made between what we are experiencing on an emotional level, whether it is an emotion or a feeling, and the words and actions that follow. Generally speaking, emotions will make you want to speak or act out much more than feelings and usually in a negative or hurtful way.

Feel and be aware

The significance which I am trying to make here is that whatever you feel (or emote) you still have (some) control over your reactivity. If you feel that you are out of control, you can be sure that you are experiencing emotions from undealt with past hurtful situations.

[Tweet “The more emotional you are, the more you will feel reactive towards what is coming to you from outside.”] This is an invitation to look at those things and deal with them once and for all.

I don’t want to deal with old stuff

If you hear yourself think or say out loud that you are not interested in dealing with this old stuff, you are consciously or unconsciously afraid of what it might bring up. Let me be clear: we all have those things we would rather not look at! It is common to feel uneasy, especially about those things that you are not really conscious about yet, but also about those situations that you would rather not look at again.

Allowing emotions and feelings

Whatever you stuff down or avoid on an emotional level will be stored in your connective tissue whether you want it or not. The more intense a situation is, the more energy you will need in future to keep it down. This is the energy that you are lacking in your day-to-day life. It is also what people often are trying to avoid by drowning it with alcohol or any other excessive activity.

So when exactly is it time for you to deal with it now?

Filed Under: emotions/feelings Tagged With: allowing emotions, dealing with emotions, emotions versus feelings

Primary Sidebar

Cart

Subscribe for updates
    Built with ConvertKit
    Nathalie Himmelrich

    I accompany people therapeutically as a holistic counsellor and coach.

    I walk alongside people dealing with the challenges presented by life and death.

    I’m also a writer and published author of multiple grief resource books and the founder of the Grieving Parents Support Network.

    Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Affiliate Disclosure

    Copyright © 2012 - 2022 Nathalie Himmelrich | All Rights Reserved

    We use cookies on our website to give you the most relevant experience by remembering your preferences and repeat visits. By clicking “Accept”, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. However you may visit Cookie Settings to provide a controlled consent.
    Cookie settingsACCEPT
    Manage consent

    Privacy Overview

    This website uses cookies to improve your experience while you navigate through the website. Out of these cookies, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. But opting out of some of these cookies may have an effect on your browsing experience.
    Necessary
    Always Enabled
    Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. These cookies ensure basic functionalities and security features of the website, anonymously.
    CookieDurationDescription
    cookielawinfo-checkbox-analytics11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics".
    cookielawinfo-checkbox-functional11 monthsThe cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional".
    cookielawinfo-checkbox-necessary11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary".
    cookielawinfo-checkbox-others11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other.
    cookielawinfo-checkbox-performance11 monthsThis cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance".
    viewed_cookie_policy11 monthsThe cookie is set by the GDPR Cookie Consent plugin and is used to store whether or not user has consented to the use of cookies. It does not store any personal data.
    Functional
    Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features.
    Performance
    Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors.
    Analytics
    Analytical cookies are used to understand how visitors interact with the website. These cookies help provide information on metrics the number of visitors, bounce rate, traffic source, etc.
    Advertisement
    Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads.
    Others
    Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet.
    Save & Accept