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Nathalie Himmelrich

Inspiring Hope | Finding healthy ways of Grieving | Writer

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gary chapman

Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages and their use in the Workplace

August 16, 2011 By Nathalie Himmelrich Leave a Comment

love in a coffee
Photo by Albert S on Unsplash

Gary Chapman’s approach to the five love languages has multifaceted usability, even in the workplace. If you want to read more about the different love languages, you can find plenty of my articles about them here (click here). His approach to teaching us how different people show love and how different people feel the love that you’re intending to show them has been an integral part of counselling couples, families and children to understand themselves and each other better.  When I’ve worked with this model with couples I have many times that they come back reporting how it not only improves their relationship with each other but also taught them something about how to relate to their work colleagues, employees, friends, children etc.

Personal Benefit

I also found that it is of great benefit for your own self knowing to understand how you search for love and admiration. It surprises me, again and again, to find myself fishing for treats that fulfil my strategy. It’s like your ’emotional love account’ has the highest return on investment when payments in Euro come in and people around you seem to be wanting to pay in US $. It just doesn’t give the same return, even though it might be their favourite currency.

So what’s your primary ‘love currency’?

  • Words Of Affirmation
  • Quality Time
  • Receiving Gifts
  • Acts Of Service
  • Physical Touch

You can read up on them by clicking on the link provided.

Experiment

Do you know the ‘love currency’ of the people you closely interact with? How about an experiment: If you have a good sense of a person, you might be able to guess their primary ‘love currency’. For the next week, go ahead and pay them with their primary ‘love currency’. Remember that this might not be what you’re most used to playing with so it might mean that you have to be a bit creative here (change some of your $ into their currency). The links above will give you some ideas on what you can do or say in each of the love languages. Note the change in your relationship with that person. If it has improved, you have most likely guessed right, if not, try again.

Have you already read about the other Love Languages?

Here they are all listed:

  • The Five Love Languages (Summary)
  • Love Language Part 1 – Words Of Affirmation
  • Love Language Part 2 – Quality Time
  • Love Language Part 3 – Receiving Gifts
  • Love Language Part 4 – Acts Of Service
  • Love Language Part 5 – Physical Touch
  • Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages and their use in the Workplace

Reference

Please also refer to the book ‘The five Love Languages’ by Gary Chapman

Filed Under: love/relationship/marriage, communication, self development/motivation Tagged With: gary chapman, love at work, love language, love languages, love languages at work

Love Language Part 5 – Physical Touch

November 5, 2008 By Nathalie Himmelrich Leave a Comment

couple kissing
Photo by Natalia Sobolivska on Unsplash

Communicating love via physical touch

We have long known that physical touch is a way of communicating emotional love. Research projects in the area of child development have made that conclusion: Babies who are held, hugged and kissed develop a healthier emotional life than those who are left for long periods of time without physical contact.

Holding hands, kissing, embracing, and having sexual intercourse are all ways of communicating emotional love to one’s spouse.

Is touch part of your love language?

The touch of love may take many forms. Since touch receptors are located throughout the body, lovingly touching your spouse almost anywhere can be an expression of love. That does not mean that all touches are created equal.

Within every language, there are many dialects. Here below you will find just a few but in the end, you need to understand your spouse’s dialect.

[Read more…] about Love Language Part 5 – Physical Touch

Filed Under: love/relationship/marriage, communication Tagged With: five love languages, gary chapman, love language, physical touch

Love Language Part 3 – Receiving Gifts

August 27, 2008 By Nathalie Himmelrich 2 Comments

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

A gift is something that you can hold in your hand and say, “Look, he was thinking of me,” or “She remembered me.” You must be thinking of someone to give a gift. The gift itself is a symbol of that thought. It doesn’t matter if it costs money.

Gifts need not too expensive, nor must they be given weekly. But for some individuals, their worth has nothing to do with monetary value and everything to do with love.

Within every language, there are many dialects. Here below you will find just a few but in the end, you need to understand your spouse’s dialect.

Purchased Gifts

Anything you can imagine, how much it costs is less important than the thought that goes with it. If a millionaire gives only one-dollar gifts regularly, the spouse may question whether that is an expression of love, but when family finances are limited, a one-dollar gift may speak a million dollars worth of love.

Gifts you find

For example a flower from the yard or side of the road, a shell from the beach, a special stick etc. Anything that you add meaning to.

The Gift of Self

There is an intangible gift that sometimes speaks more loudly than a gift that can be held in one’s hand. This is the gift of self or the gift of presence. Being there when your spouse needs you speaks loudly to the one whose primary love language is receiving gifts.

If your spouse’s love language is RECEIVING GIFTS:

[Read more…] about Love Language Part 3 – Receiving Gifts

Filed Under: love/relationship/marriage, communication, self development/motivation Tagged With: gary chapman, gift, gifts, love language, receiving

Love Language Part 2 – Quality Time

May 18, 2008 By Nathalie Himmelrich Leave a Comment

Photo by Limor Zellermayer on Unsplash

Giving someone your undivided attention is spending ‘quality time’ with them. A central aspect of quality time is togetherness. Togetherness has to be focused attention. The important thing emotionally is that you are spending focused time with each other. The activity is a vehicle that creates a sense of togetherness.

Within every language, there are many dialects. Here below you will find just a few but in the end, you need to understand your spouse’s dialect.

Togetherness

Spending time together with focused attention. What happens on an emotional level is what matters. It communicates that you care about each other, that you enjoy being with each other, and that you like to do things together.

Quality conversation

Quality conversation is a sympathetic dialogue where two individuals are sharing their experiences, thoughts, feeling, and desires in a friendly, uninterrupted context. Words of affirmation focus on what we are saying, whereas quality conversation focuses on what we are hearing.

Some practical tips:

[Read more…] about Love Language Part 2 – Quality Time

Filed Under: love/relationship/marriage, communication Tagged With: communication, gary chapman, love language, quality time

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    Nathalie Himmelrich

    I accompany people therapeutically as a holistic counsellor and coach.

    I walk alongside people dealing with the challenges presented by life and death.

    I’m also a writer and published author of multiple grief resource books and the founder of the Grieving Parents Support Network.

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