• Skip to main content
  • Skip to primary sidebar

Nathalie Himmelrich

Inspiring Hope | Finding healthy ways of Grieving | Writer

  • My Books
    • NEW BOOK! Bridging The Grief Gap
    • Amazon shop
    • eBooks (Downloads)
    • Swiss store (CH only)
      • My Account
  • Grieving Parents
  • Connect to Me
    • About Nathalie
    • Media Links
    • Blog-old
  • Work with Me
    • Counselling and Coaching
  • Blog
  • English

The Healing Is In The Feeling

September 10, 2019 By Nathalie Himmelrich Leave a Comment

Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

… and that is why it doesn’t help to be told ‘you should just get over it’.

So many times bereaved parents hear sentences that proclaim myths about their grieving and healing. We all have heard those myths, so much so that we have come to believe many of them. So it’s no surprise we, as the bereaved, struggle with healing after loss because it’s so different than portrayed or spoken about in society.

That’s where…

  • YOU (the bereaved) talking about your loss
  • YOU being open about your feelings and thoughts
  • YOU remembering your child
  • YOU openly sharing your tears when grief is triggered
  • YOU celebrating your child’s memory
  • YOU standing tall accepting where you are on your journey with grief

… are making a difference. 

You are a grief and healing warrior

You are a hope spreader, truth speaker, way bearer, silence breaker, taboo destroyer, meaning creator, new normal ambassador and a human resilient healer.

Some of the myths, that we have heard for aeons are the following, or versions of:

get over the loss, stop talking about it, move on, forget about it, time heals all wounds, have another baby (in the case of a bereaved parent), think about… (your husband, your other surviving children), keep yourself busy.

As you all know, most of those are not helpful and deny us of our experience that we have to the point were we ourselves say “I shouldn’t be crying…” or “I’m sorry I lost it” when we feel what is a natural part of healing.

Healing is in the feeling. Healing happens one conversation at the time, thought by thought, tear after tear that runs down our cheeks. Healing can also happen by doing something, creating new meaning, putting your brainpower into a project or your physical power into building something. Healing is so varied and often happens without us even knowing it is happening. It also happens when we think ‘I’m feeling worse again’ or ‘I’ve gone backwards’.

Natural experience

Stop denying your experience. Stop giving other people the power to deny your experience. What you experience naturally is just that: natural.

Yes, of course, you can increase your not so pleasant feelings by doing the very thing you know increases it: for example looking at photos, listening to specific music. It doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do that, it means to be mindful when and how you do it.

So, how can you own your experience? By becoming and being aware of your own emotions, thoughts, actions, behaviours and spoken words. By taking responsibility for those powers and not let those be directed by what other people or society think or feel.

Filed Under: child loss, grief/loss, grieving parents Tagged With: child loss, grief, grief myth, grief myths, grieving, grieving parents, healing, loss, miscarriage, parental grief, pregnancy loss, trauma

Reader Interactions

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

ten − seven =

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Primary Sidebar

Cart

  • Email
  • Facebook
  • Instagram
  • LinkedIn
  • Twitter
  • YouTube

Copyright © 2012 - 2021 Nathalie Himmelrich