Do you start sentences with “always” or “never” as the second word? That is what is called ‘all-or-nothing’ thinking or generalising. If you happen to think like that you are most likely rarely (or never?) happy with what you have achieved and are highly critical of yourself and others. Is this me? If you think […]
Meta Programs – All-Or-Nothing Thinking Read More »
Meta Programs are processes that operate at a metal level, which influence other lower mental levels (meta meaning ‘above’). They help you understand how you (and others) make sense of the world, and how you shape your values, beliefs and behaviours. The term meta-programs comes from the world of NLP and is widely used in
Meta Programs – Discounting and Counting Read More »
Many couples head into a relationship with lots of enthusiasm. This is good, right? This is what makes most relationships so interesting and exciting at the beginning. There are a lot of assumptions created from the honeymoon period hormones, which are then turned into expectations for the remainder of the relationship. Let’s have a look
Relationship Wisdom – Create A Relationship Vision Read More »
Who does not feel overwhelmed at times? I certainly do, more often than I would like to. Today, I have achieved a higher level of insight on the recipe that leads to a number of my overwhelming moments, which I would like to share with you. Have a think about what aspects of this recipe
Understanding Self-Overwhelm Pattern Read More »
Knowing whether you are a matcher or a mismatcher or neither can make life much easier. These terms are used in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) as a person’s ‘Meta-Program’ to describe a person’s habitual thinking patterns. Let’s find out more. What is a mismatcher? In conversations, for example, a mismatcher is a person who will automatically
Are You A ‘Mismatcher’? Read More »
My husband, my daughter and I are currently sharing living space with my father and sometimes his new partner. Today after breakfast my father said to his partner: “I will do it!”, pointing at the dishes on the table, as she was rushing to get ready. As he carried out the plates into the kitchen,
Relationship Wisdom – Old Family Patterns Read More »
As a counsellor, coach or other therapist we are not exempt from needing help. We all do face life issues that we cannot easily deal with ourselves and need an outside expert to support us. Even though we work in the field of supporting people it does not mean we can easily fix all our own problems.
Knowing When to Get Help Read More »
This reminded me of the multifaceted usability of Gary Chapman’s approach. If you want to read more about the different love languages, you can find plenty of my articles about it here (click here). His approach on teaching us how different people show love and how different people feel the love that you’re intending to show them has been an integral part of counselling couples, families and children to understand themselves and each other better. When I’ve worked with this model with couples I have many times that they come back reporting how it not only improves their relationship with each other but also tought them something about how to relate to their work colleagues, employees, friends, children etc.
Gary Chapman’s Five Love Languages and their use in the Workplace Read More »
Part of anyone’s personal development will be getting to know yourself and learning to tap into your intuition. At the beginning of that endeavor this can be a not so easy challenge to sort out “what really is intuition and what is all the other ‘crap’”? Conditioning To shed a bit more light on what’s
Self Knowledge – Differentiating Intuition From Conditioning Read More »
Have you been listening to your self lately? What are you saying to yourself or out loud and are you paying attention? With everything we say, we share something about our selves. Self-listening is a key to self-knowing and self-development.
Personal Development – Inviting Self-Listening Read More »
